Thursday, August 30, 2001

There is a commercial I hear on netcasts of my Giants games that goes like this:

Announcer: Tell us about your perfect checking account!
Syrupy Voice: It would be free! It would be easily accessible on the net! etc.

not once does Syrupy Voice come up with the most obvious feature in a given "perfect" checking account:

It would always be full of money.

Any way you slice it, that feature would pretty much come up number one in my book. My perfect checking account would probably have to go to work for me too, freeing up more of my valuable time. Also, my perfect checking account would be ruled over by an evil mallard duck with a hedge trimmer, who wouldn't allow me to go blow money on frivolous impulse purchases like this.

Speaking of perfect, have you ever dreamt up your perfect breakfast cereal? submit it to the big boys at Post. I know mine would be a lot like Smurfberry Crunch, except it wouldn't leave your upper palate raw and bleeding. And it might taste more like beef jerky too.

Here is a group of people discussing the breakfast cereals of yesteryear. I picture them sitting on those maroon-colored overstuffed leather chairs in a musty library, decked out in smoking jackets, sipping Port and puffing on pipes as they discuss, with near-poetic nostalgia, the truly soul-touching taste of C3POs.

Want to collect something that may attract families of rodents? How bout cereal boxes?

Maybe you'd just like to peruse the cavalcade of delightful advertising characters cereal has brought us over the years? Pretty interesting site actually.


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