Thursday, September 26, 2002

Also, since I'm generally complaining about things here, let me say that I spent a terrifying thirty seconds this morning trapped in the elevator of my apartment hive community with a guy who could not stop sneezing. I mean this guy really couldn't stop sneezing.

You know, when you sneeze a couple of times, and you think to yourself "Wow, that was a lot of sneezing right there! I'm lucky nothing else came out of me."? This guys must have sneezed eight times. EIGHT times! In thirty seconds.

I didn't know what to do. There was nowhere to run. I backed against the corner of the elevator and watched in silent horror, as my fellow elevatorer put his hand up to his nose and tried to stop what must have been a torrential flow of goo. It was like some Peckinpah shootout movie, with the sneezes replayed over and over and over in frame-by-frame.

The elevator is chrome or some kind of shiny metal on the inside, and that only magnified the horror: all around me were reflections of the sneeze! Repeated endlessly into infinity.

That guy was a sneezing machine.


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