Thursday, November 29, 2001

So today I had to have a picture of myself (well,my hand anyway) taken holding the company's product, because I have big hands and it made the product look small. Draw your own conclusions.

Anyway, after we took the picture the photoshop guy took the background out and I inserted the photo into a brochure I'm making in Quark XPress.

"But Kafkaesque." I hear you cry "Why must you trouble us with this boring tale of your humdrum existence?!"

Because, my friends, it started to get a little bit creepy. Here I am, fiddling around with what is, ostensibly*, a picture of my disembodied hand! To make matters worse, the photoshop guy had kind of feathered the wrist-end of the picture, making it really look like a severed hand traveling around the page, re-justifying text all willy-nilly.

And even worse than that, I saw a film last night called The Crimson Rivers, starring internationally recognized Stupendous Badass Jean Reno, and the movie featured numerous shots of severed hands! Including a whole bucketful of them. Yikes! The movie, buy the way, is ok if you're into Stupendous Badass Jean Reno. Otherwise it's a little disappointing. Top marks on the severed hands though. Very lifelike.

So what I'm getting at here is it was creepy. Did I mention that? Well it was. I'm going to curl up with some chamomile tea now and try not to think about it, until I go to sleep and have nightmares about my severed hand and serif fonts.

*For fun, use the word "ostensibly" in every sentence you can until people start to notice and stop inviting you to parties. "Ostensibly" is a word you can use to make yourself appear smarter than you actually are, which is always nice.


Blog Archive