Wednesday, November 21, 2001

Just a word on this whole "mobile pants" thing:

I am hopeful that soon there will come a day when you will be able to purchase pants that will hold your laptop as well as your PDA, along with maybe the yellow pages and medium sized rocks. I envision a future in which pants rule the earth! People carry around so much weight in their voluminous pants pockets that they lose all ambulatory power, in a cruel twist on the "mobile" pants theme.

Then, after experiments to free ourselves from the shackles of our mobile pants, the pants become saturated with Gamma Rays (much like Bill Bixby except that he's a dead actor who turned into the Hulk and hosted a TV show whose title I can't remember but which I think had something to do with Roald Dahl, and the pants are not) and become sentient pants, roaming the land in gargantuan herds, dragging their sobbing owners behind them as they do terrible things that pants have always secretly fantasized about, like...well...bad pants stuff.

Hmm this sounded much more interesting when I started.

Oh well. Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Eat lots of turkey and enjoy the wonders of bloating, napping and breaking wind with the rest of the country. I know I will.


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