Monday, March 15, 2004

The Sizzler Seduction Scenario

Notes for possible short story/novel/rock opera/religious master narrative:

- A man, Julio, lounges by the all-you-can-eat salad bar of a Sizzler, making lurid suggestions to women using a langostino and drawn butter for visual aid.

- possible love scene involving sex on the salad bar, awkward moment with sneeze guard. Could strategically place pickled beets for propriety/ R rating.

- Educational song explaining that chickpeas and garbanzos are essentially the same thing. Note: Make chickpeas represent the struggle of Native Americans in the last century. What rhymes with garbanzo?

- Can one commit suicide by drinking a gallon of Thousand Island Dressing? Must research or final revelation will be meaningless.

- A gang of langostinos save Julio the salad bar Romeo at crucial moment, teaching him about forgiveness and the redeeming power of love.

- Big closing musical number during which the entire cast pelt each other with Texas Bread and cheap steak.

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